How to start a digital dialog with teens and tweens

Carrie Pasquarello, CEO & Co-Founder, Global Secure Resources Inc.

I always suggest starting a proactive communication plan early in life when our children are young. Setting time each day to teach communication skills will improve relationships also incorporate empathy skills and exercises. But don’t worry if you are already at a stage where you feel every conversation is a challenge with your teen. It is not easy raising teens today. The good news is we have tips for developing a positive communication plan with those tough to reach kids. Start by asking open-ended questions. This technique allows your teen to answer you with more than a yes or no to your question.

An example would be "What was your favorite part of your day?” instead of How was your day? Where they could answer with one word “Fine” or Good.  You want to spend some time developing your question-asking skills. Once the positive communication plan is in place, you can start an open conversation aboutdigital dangers.

How to protect children from predators who might try to groom them on popular online games?

One of the techniques I use when teaching children about online safety is to teach risk mitigation. We first need to know the risk to avoid the risk. I share information about ongoing sting operations that involve the FBI’s IC3 and Project Safe Childhood. We go over how criminals and predators use risk mitigation techniques too so that they won’t get caught. We go over techniques criminals use to fool and fake victims. We highlight the importance to improve students' instincts and intuition. We want children involved in creating a proactive preparedness plan.

How to close the SAFETY GAP:

We begin by incorporating 5 strategies:

· Communication Plan

· Awareness

· Values & Boundaries

· Red flags

· Intuition

Next, after the communication piece is in place, we help parents address:

· Inappropriate content

· Bullying

· Criminals

· Predators – who they are and how we can detect their presence

· Force, Fraud, and coercion

5 RED FLAGS: If someone asks the following questions, a red flag should go up. If you feel something is wrong, it probably is. That is your intuition.

· Are you alone?

· I will hurt your family if you don’t…

· You are so mature.

· Your parents don’t know you as I do.

· Don’t tell anyone.

INTUITION:

· Something is weird or something doesn’t feel right about this situation. There is no concrete evidence just a feeling.

When you have red flags or intuition, we want students to speak up and talk with a parent.