Key Takeaways

When kids use disappearing messages to communicate with others, the sense of secrecy can embolden kids to say or show things they wouldn't normally share—and it also emboldens others to say or show inappropriate or harassing things to your child

Disappearing messages can make it harder for kids to turn to parents or other trusted adults with things that have made them uncomfortable, since the harmful words/behaviors may have vanished. If your kids are using disappearing messages, be sure they know to screenshot things that don't seem right so they have evidence of it. Be sure to let them know they can still tell a trusted adult even if they don't have a record or screenshot of a conversation.

Parents need to make sure kids are aware that it's not okay to say things in disappearing-app mode that they wouldn't say in a regular chage—someone else might screenshot it, use it against them, or worse. There's also a high risk of your child's words being taken out of context.

Dialogue Starters

What's different about the conversations you have with people using disappearing messages? 

How can you know whether or not to trust someone you're chatting with not to screenshot parts of what you thought was a private conversation? 

What would you do if someone said something to you online that you found disturbing? 

Additional resources for parents

Family Media Agreement

Negative Effects of Snapchat for Teens

Negative Effects of Social Media & Screen Time: What Parents, Educators, & Students Need to Know

Conclusion

Disappearing messages may seem like a safe way for teens to communicate, but they can quickly lead to unintended risks that impact their safety, privacy, and well-being. As parents, understanding these potential dangers and talking openly with your teen can make all the difference. By staying informed about how these apps work and encouraging your child to consider the long-term effects of their online interactions, you can help them make smarter, safer choices.

‍